Ami's First Love
by lilac avenue
Summary: Hehe my attempt at a comedy i hope you think its funny. its a script i wrote for my sm radio play. Containts inapropriate language and matirial but dont let that stop ya ^_~


::script:: Ami's First Love:: 

::script:: Ami's First Love:: 

Before you read this I must warn you...this is a comedy (or at least I hope so but my sense of humor may not inflict you, which is usually the case) But it starts off as not a comedy. Just give it a couple paragraphs. But some of the humor may be offending to a younger audience so you at least have to be 13 or older but it isn't that bad. Um that's it (plus this have like nothing to do with Ami;s first love so its kinda odd lol) 

Ami's first love 

Ami: Hello! My name is Ami Mizuno. Born September 10th, a Virgo, blood type: A. My hobbies are reading writing and listening to music. My favorite color is blue, and swimming is my favorite sport...Math is my best school subject. But, one thing I'm not good at receiving is...what...a...a......love letter! AHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT GOOD!!!! 

Makoto: Well, I wouldn't mind having your problem right now Ami. 

Usagi: [Longingly, completely forgetting Mamoru in the moment] Me either! 

Ami: It's not like I've received a lot or anything, but.... it's just that I get this horrible reaction to them. 

Rei: Taste aversion, I think it's called... 

Minako: [in a "spirit lifting" manner] Ami, you know what they say: "Life's short and love's a battle." [Embarrassed] What?? Was that wrong? 

Artemis: [embarrassed] I think the correct saying is "Life's short, love while you can." 

Minako: eh... right. haha sorry. I was up all night. 

Usagi: Hee hee! And doing what Minako? (starts cracking up) I crack myself up... 

Luna: Usagi! 

Usagi: (laughing but then stops.) What? Oh, eh, sorry. Don't mind me 

Ami: (giggle) You know you guys.... I think there's only one thing we should be passionately doing in our last year of junior high school, and that is study as hard as we can. 

Minako: Yes! And that was exactly what I was doing last night if you must know Usagi! 

Usagi: (giggle) Yes but studying (pause) what?! Haha! (starts laughing) 

Ami: Well she was probably studying for our algebra quiz Usagi that we have TODAY. 

Usagi: eh... ok... (cough cough) never mind... some people just dont understand.... 

Ami: As for this note, love is not in my dictionary at the moment. 

Usagi: ai.... Ami-chan don't you want a senpai? You were looking at Motoki a lot yesterday. He is very kokoii, but Mamoru is my bishonen. 

Ami: Usagi! 

Usagi: Gomen gomen Ami! Sometimes my mouth just runs away with me... 

Rei: Don't forget your brain. 

Usagi: Rei! 

Rei: Sorry, sorry. Couldn't resist. 

Usagi: Humph! 

Makoto: That sounds like a mating call... 

Rei: Of the Odango Atomas! 

Usagi: Ya, but im the one and only! 

Rei: Thankfully... 

Ami: Hello?! Can we get back to me here? 

Usagi: Oh put a sock in it Ami and go study something! 

Ami: Good idea! 

Minako: (whispering to Makoto) Hey, Makoto, cant you cook something to shut Usagi up? 

Makoto: Ya but what about Rei? 

Minako: Ill say I have to go to the bathroom and then sneak off and look for Chibi Usa and have her go to the temple and kill the crows. 

Makoto: All that for this little fight? You should have seen Usagi vs Rei 2000! And how will Chibi Usa kill them? 

Minako: All she has to do is talk and they'll probably drop over dead from her voice. Plus this isn't any Chibi USA. And this is pay back! 

Makoto: It isn't? 

Minako: No its (dramatic pause) The NA dubbed anime Chibi Usa.... RINI! 

Makoto: What the? Her name is Rini? Who the hell would call someone Rini? 

Minako: Well, the person who called her Rini.... 

Makoto: Ohhhh..... 

Minako: Plus the voice for Rini is awful! It even makes me want to drop dead when I here it. But then again just the fact that she is Usagi's daughter says enough about her.... 

Makoto: Ok good luck Minako. Oh and here is a pair of spiffy sunglasses to wear. 

Minako: awwwwwww! Wow. Pretty! I can see my reflection... Oh yes (cough cough) anyways mission..... Odango! 

Makoto: No.... I have mission Odango! Im the one who's going to choke Usagi with a jawbreaker! 

Minako: Fine, I have mission.... Pink Sperm! Ahem I mean spore... 

Makoto: Eh.... Ok... 

Minako: Oh no you guys! I got a call of nature..... 

Usagi: Well your call of nature better not involve my Mamoru! 

Luna: So that's what she means at night when she doesn't come back for hours. I always thought it was blatter or bowel problems.... 

Minako: Wha? (cough cough) No Usagi, I mean I gotta go to the bathroom. 

Usagi: (embarrassed.) oh eh... just checking! Better safe then sorry! 

Ami: Hey talking about that always remember to have safe se....... 

Rei: Ami, its ok, we don't have any ads in this.... 

Ami: We don't? Damn it. I got that line all memorized. And it got me all horn.... 

Makoto: OK! Moving on, are you guy's hungry? 

Usagi: Yes and not for just food.... Oh no, did I say that out loud? 

Makoto: Who wants FOOD?! F-o-o-d? 

Usagi: Show me the turkey! 

Rei: Look in the mirror then. 

Makoto: Ok, well I don't have any turkey right now so.... 

Rei: Cook Usagi. There isn't much of a difference. 

Makoto: eh, It's ok... I got a better idea! What about... 

Rei: Turkey damn it! 

Makoto: We don't have turkey! And no we are not cooking Usagi. What about cookies? 

Usagi: Wha? Did someone say nookies? 

Makoto: Ok fine, Jawbreakers! 

Usagi: Oh sorry, but my mouth has already taken to many large things like one time I gave Mamoru a Bl... 

Ami: I thought this radio play was about me damn it! 

Luna: Oh cut the crap Ami I never get in the spot light either im always supposed to be the cat. I remember when I used to be a porn star damn it and this is the respect I get? 

Ami: How can a cat be a porn star? 

Luna: See what I mean? See! I can never do anything. 

Usagi: Hee hee don't mind Luna she has PRS. 

Makoto: PRS? 

Usagi: Periodical Rei Symptoms 

Ami: Actually its... 

Usagi: Shut up. 

Ami: Ok. 

Rei: Where is Artemis and Minako anyway? 

Makoto: Minako went to the bathroom and Artemis followed her. 

Usagi: HAHA! I knew it! That was what kept her up all night. 

Rei: Usagi you are out of your mind. 

Usagi: Yes, but you haven't seen what I've seen! 

Rei: And thank god for that! 

Luna: Back at the temple with Minako, Artemis, and Rini. 

Usagi: HA! See now they are having a threesome.... Whazaba? Who the hell is Rini? 

Rei: What the heck are they doing at the temple?! Grandpa better have not opened his porn shop again! 

Makoto: Hold on how would Luna know. 

Luna: Why, I am now the narrator! 

Makoto: You are? How? 

Luna: I had a vision.... 

Makoto: Eh, its alright. Lets just change scenes like Luna says... 

Usagi: What?! I thought it was Sailor Moon says?! 

Rei: Well Rei says that Usagi should get help. 

Usagi: HEY HEY! Don't go criticizing Dr. Tomoe. He is a very good psychiatrist, and he's helping me a lot. He is a very good teacher. 

Rei: Teacher? 

Usagi: Yes Mamoru is impressed with everything he taught me. Especially in the blowing depar....... 

Makoto: Whazaba? 

Ami: Did you just say Whazaba Makoto? 

Makoto: Sorry it has a catchy ring to it. 

Rei: What the heck Usagi that isn't what a shrink is for! 

Usagi: i know....(giggle) 

Ami: (cough cough) Weren't we going to change scenes? 

Luna: Wha? Oh that's my cue. Ahem. Back at the temple with Minako, Artemis, and Rini... 

(temple) 

Rini: Im tini Rini! And I don't got a weenie! 

Minako: Would you shut the hell up you pink sperm!? (embarrassed) I mean spore... 

Rini: Hey I like the sound of that! Im a pink sperm and I want a perm! 

Artemis: SHUT UP!! 

Rini: (angry) Hey! HEY! Did u just say shut up to the almighty rini? The pink sperm? HUH?! Do you want a piece of me. 

Minako: I just got a telepathic message from Usagi.... she said "And I know what piece that would be hehe" 

Artemis: I really need to get a raise (sigh) 

Rini: Awww! Look at the cute little pussy covered with black hair! 

Artemis: I really hope she's talking about Luna. 

Minako: But I don't see Luna around here anywhere. 

Artemis: Damn it. 

Minako: Hey I see the crows! 

Artemis: Thank bob! 

Minako: Ok Rini, do you see those crows over there? 

Rini: Oh yeaaaaah! 

Minako: (cough cough) Ok..... um..... well go over there and start singing to them ok? Or just do what ever your rini ways are. 

Rini: Ok! Come here crows! Give mommy a little sugar. 

Artemis: Ok that there should have killed them. 

Rini: Oops I did it again! HAHA! Did it! Get it? 

Minako: She's talking to the crows..... That is sad. 

Artemis: So does Rei. 

Minako: Ya, but for Rei its normal. You should see what else she does with the crows. 

Artemis: Eh, it's ok. 

Rini: Im a Barbie girl in a Barbie world! Life in plastic! Its fantastic! You can brush my hair and touch me anywhere...!! 

Minako: I feel sick. 

Artemis: I feel bad for the crows. 

Minako: Ohhhhh no! That's just wrong! Now she's.... 

(Artemis and Minako together) Strip dancing?! 

Rini: Come on! Gimme some sugar! 

Minako: Hey look! The birds are falling from the tree! 

Artemis: And one just fell on her head.... 

Minako: Why don't we just leave her here. 

Artemis: Alone with the tree? 

Minako: ya why? Shell be alright.... 

Artemis: No, im worried about the tree. 

Minako: Oh god no.... is she humping the tree? 

Artemis: Ok, why don't we go now? 

Minako: Good idea! They need their privacy.... 

Luna: Back here, with Usagi, Rei, Makoto, Ami, and me, Luna.... 

Usagi: Luna? Are you ok.....? 

Luna: I had another vision... 

Rei: Oh no! My crows, they are being molested! Ahhhhhhh! 

Ami: Rei, who in the world would want to seduce a crow? 

Luna: Look! All of a sudden just when we needed it a magic mirror appeared right in front of us! 

Usagi: Wow! Hey! There is me! 

Luna: No that's the NA dubbed Chibi Usa humping a tree.... 

Usagi: Oh sorry. It brought back memories.... 

Rei: AHHHHH! And all my dead crows are lying around her! 

Ami: Looks like we found our culprit. 

Rei: That little hoe! 

Usagi: Hold on, be quiet for a second... (Pause) you guys! She's talking to the tree... 

Rini: Oh tree! How I love you so! 

Usagi: Like mother like daughter... 

Minako: Hey you guys! Artemis and me are back.... Whazaba? 

Usagi: Whazaba? 

Rei: Whazaba? 

Ami: Whazaba? 

Luna: Waaaaazzzzzzzzuuup? (Pause) eh, oops sorry. I mean Whazaba? 

Minako: It was payback Rei! 

Rei: You wench! 

Minako: I know... hehe. 

Ami: Ok, for some weird reason, I thought this radio play was supposed to be about me?! 

Usagi: Ya, but you're boring Ami. 

Everyone: (agrees) yup's, or ya's, or uhuh, or you are. 

Makoto: And who would you have fallen in love with..... Your algebra book?! 

Everyone: (Laughs) 

Ami: Actually.... Ya. 

Minako: Seriously? 

Ami: Yup. The love not was an algebraic equation that said hi. 

Usagi: Hi?! 

Ami: Yes. 4 and 1 upside down in a calculator font. 

Usagi: Oh......... see I catch on quickly! 

Rei: Whats 2 + 2 Usagi? 

Usagi: 22! See? 

Luna: Well that's the end of our show! Hope to see you next time! 

Makoto: I'd be surprised if they stayed through this whole thing! 

Rei: I highly doubt anybody would. 

Usagi: But if you are still with us, well, then that's pretty sad! Cuz then, you have no life! 

Artemis: Actually we are the one who don't have a life. And that is why we made this very scary radio play. 

Minako: So sad... 

Luna: Well thanks for watching! 

Everyone: And a happy new year!


End file.
